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Y A M A
ASTEYA means "not stealing". This implies not to take something that is not yours, to use something only the way it is supposed to be used or the way it is permitted to be used.
ASTEYA requires therefore lack of greed. Wishing obsessively to have something that somebody else has, even if it is necessary or valuable for us, leads to lack of balance and unhappiness.
The Sage VYASA said: "ASTEYA is realized when the yogi, free from any desire, refuses to take possession of things that belong to others."
Therefore, if somebody wants obsessively something that belon gs to another person and takes it, he is a thief. If he does not take it, then it is not a thief but he doesn't follow ASTEYA either.
ASTEYA is when you do not take and do not desire something valuable that belongs to another person. ASTEYA implies also to refrain from any kind of injustice, to let everybody have exactly what he / she deserves.
BRAHMACHARYA means continence, refrain, retention. In the TANTRIC vision, BRAHMACHARYA is realized through the sublimation and transmutation of the sexual energy, using it for psycho-mental and spiritual purposes.
The secret here is to realize a perfect control over the sexual energy but not through giving up sex but through a plenary erotic activity in which the couple separates orgasm from ejaculation and suspends ejaculation no matter how long, intense of often the lovemaking.
The purpose of suspending ejaculation is double: to retain seminal fluid (conserve energy and thus achieve higher states of sexual pleasure and fulfillment) and to transmute its energy (achieve expanded levels of consciousness).
The most recent conclusions of modern sexology agree with traditional TANTRIC teachings. Sexual therapists are now starting to encourage couples to focus more on the process of lovemaking rather than the end result (ejaculation).
The secret treatise VIJNANA BHAIRAVA TANTRA says: "Stay with the (erotic) fire of the beginning and avoid the poison of the end."
The satisfaction found in this way is incomparably greater than having an ejaculatory orgasm. The most revolutionary conclusion of the sexual researches is that man doesn't need to ejaculate at all when making love to a woman.
The fundamental error couples make, due to ignorance and bad habit, is to believe that ejaculation and orgasm are one and the same thing, that orgasm can be achieved through ejaculation only and therefore ejaculation is the peak pleasure for the couple.
Some women believe that if they are not capable of bringing their man to a powerful ejaculation they are not sensual enough. There is nothing more false.
Stated with extreme simplicity, orgasm is an intense beatific state of consciousness and canceling of ego, with profound harmonizing, relaxing and regenerative effects.
Male and female ejaculations are only complex physiologic processes of explosively energetic discharge with dim manifestation of a brief, incipient orgasm, experienced in a selfish unilateral way. During ejaculation the vital energy is quickly wasted for no purpose (except, of course, when conception is wanted).
In this completely new and spiritual approach, sexuality becomes a modality of self-knowledge and spiritual growth. The extraordinary intensity of emotions felt in this way transfigures both man and woman, revealing unknown dimensions of their psyche.
Sexual union between two lovers which love deeply each other becomes a modality of concentrating and directing the consciousness' activity toward the Supreme Being.
Due to the enormous intensity of this union, the consciousness of both lovers develop and fuse, at the beginning between themselves and later with the Cosmic Consciousness.
The indescribable beatitude then felt embraces all things and beings. All that still subsists is a never-ending thirst for Unity, only a Lover and a Loved-one.
APARIGRAHA means "not to pile up". The meaning of this is not to accumulate that which you don't really need, because this creates undesirable links, hindering the harmonious development of the human being.
APARIGRAHA does not mean to be satisfied with little, but to totally enjoy what you have, even if your possessions are very modest.
The key here is to have full control over your possessions and not to allow them to control you through the greed or possessiveness that they may create.
With the same happiness we enjoy physical, mental or spiritual possessions, we should be able to give them avay. Possess your things and inner qualities as if you would not have them.
However, the material possessions are not an impediment if you are perfectly detached, and this does not mean indifferent but fully aware of the place of those possessions in your life.